Calm Births empowering families!

A word we use a LOT at Calm Births is empowerment.

One of our main drivers is to empower families to achieve positive, calm births. Our other goal and passion is to empower people to share their skillset and become amazing hypnobirthing teachers themselves, who can then in turn empower people in their own communities. It’s an amazing cycle!

The two processes are surprisingly not that different - with parents-to-be we are educating them in the process of birth, and giving them specific techniques that they can use in any situation where they feel anxious or out of control. We offer them support specific to their individual circumstances and hold their hand until they are holding their baby in their arms.

With teachers-to-be, with fully educate them in birth, hypnobirthing and antenatal education. We give them a specific syllabus to use that works, we give them specific tools that work to build a business and we hold their hand all the way along their journey to becoming successful in their new businesses.

In both areas, we are people’s cheerleaders, we’re giving them accurate, evidence based information and arming them with it, and holding their hands on their special journeys.

It’s what makes us tick and we love it!

To find a hypnobirthing teacher near you just look here. Or to learn more about becoming a hypnobirthing teacher look here x

Hypnobirthing in Dorset - an interview with Dr Michelle Irving

We are very proud at Calm Births to have a teacher as experienced in the birth world as Dr Michelle Irving. She is a Mum of 2, an experienced practising Midwife with a PhD in Midwifery, and lectures at Bournemouth University. Michelle offers one to one or group Calm Births hypnobirthing courses in and around Poole, Dorset. I recently caught up with Michelle to chat about her journey to hypnobirthing:

All of our teachers have different journeys that bring them to hypnobirthing, what was yours?

My journey into hypnobirthing started as a midwife working with women who were using hypnobirthing and having incredible births, they were transformed and empowered and therefore equipped to be effective parents.

What's your favourite thing about being a hypnobirthing teacher?

I love being able to teach women/couples and help them become empowered - teaching about how their bodies work, what they can do to achieve calm and understand the process of birth, birth hormones and biomechanics and the birth environment.

How do you think Covid has affected pregnant people?

I think for many people the pandemic has made them feel vulnerable and isolated. I have spoken to people who felt somewhat abandoned by the maternity services and anxious about not having their partners present for scans, appointments or early labour. People tell me they are cautious about face to face contact, but also miss real world interactions.

What would your top tips be for preparing for birth for parents to be?

Join a childbirth education/hypnobirthing class

Fix your fears

Achieve and maintain health through nutrition, activity and mindfulness

Make informed decisions about your care - know about the medical interventions, their pros, cons and alternatives

Find your support

Stay active and relaxed in labour

Use water and massage

Those are great tips! What would your top tips for preparing for parenthood be?

Keep it simple - eat, sleep, relax, repeat

Plan a babymoon - stay home and rest and recuperate with your baby

Keep your baby close

Ask for support

Thank you so much Michelle, and how can people find out more about you and your courses?

I have a website www.bestbirths.co.uk where people can find out more about me as well as being on Instagram and Facebook.

You can also find Michelle’s profile on our ‘Find your teacher’ page.

Hypnobirthing in Reading, Berkshire

With 40+ Calm Births Hypnobirthing teachers around the UK and four just in the Reading area alone, we’ve got you covered! We are super lucky in the Reading area to have four qualified Hypnobirthing instructors ready to take you on your journey to achieve a positive, calm birth.

Calm Births is very privileged to be one of only three hypnobirthing companies in the UK who are accredited by the Royal College of Midwives, so you can rest assured that our teachers are trained to a very high standard and give you good, evidence based knowledge based on science (and passion!)

So let’s introduce you to your hypnobirthing teachers offering courses in Reading:

Katie (far left in picture) - is a Mum of two gorgeous girls, also a certified Life Coach and teaches parents in and around the Spencers Wood area. Katie began her hypnobirthing journey when she joined Calm Births classes as a Mum-to-be herself. Using the Calm Births techniques empowered her to have two wonderful, relaxed and positive births and she is now very passionate about sharing these skills with other parents-to-be in the area. Katie teaches both 1:1 and groups both live and virtually. You can see Katie’s website at Mind Body Mother Hypnobirthing.

Sarah (second from left in picture) - similarly to Katie, Sarah began her journey to hypnobirthing with her first pregnancy during which she took Calm Births classes. Sarah went on to have two very positive birth experiences and now loves to share this knowledge with parents in and around the Aldermaston area. Sarah is also a Paediatric Nurse and practising Health Visitor, and so comes with a real wealth of wisdom and knowledge about all things baby! You can get in touch with Sarah by email at: hello@islandbirthco.com

Linda (third from left in picture) - Linda has 20+ years experience in the birth world as an antenatal educator and Doula, empowering and supporting parents to be with education and passion. Linda also runs the very popular Reading homebirth support group which you can see here. She runs classes from her home in Woodley or virtually for those further away. You can see Linda’s website at Woodley Hypnobirthing.

Hannah (far right in picture) - Hannah is the founder of Calm Births, having used her 10 years experience as a Midwife and subsequent career as a Hypnotherapist as the basis for the creation of the course (that and having her own three babies!). Hannah teaches from her home in Burghfield Common, or happily via Zoom to people further afield. She now also trains other passionate people to become Calm Births instructors around the country. To see some more information about Hannah just see her page here.

So you see - any pregnant people in Reading looking for hypnobirthing classes are pretty well covered by our amazing team! For a full list of instructors around the UK you can click here.

Mum & Baby Yoga classes in Reading

Calm Births Mum & Baby Yoga classes are back in Reading! Following a rather prolonged hiatus due to Covid, we are now able to resume face to face classes safely.

Mum & Baby Yoga classes are designed specifically for Mums and their non-mobile babies, the Yoga is for Mum to very gently regain her pre-pregnancy strength and core balance, and we entertain the baby along the way. This is a wonderful way to bond with your baby in a fun environment. Our classes are small, relaxed and friendly - lots of wonderful friendships have been made between parents (and babies too!). We have plenty of time to chat about the important things, to look after you emotionally as well as physically.

We know that babies will need to be fed, cuddled or changed at various points and that is all fine. There is no judgement of any kind, I encourage you to do what your baby needs you to do, and to join in with what you can.

I am a qualified Birthlight Yoga teacher with a background in Midwifery, and I am also a Mum of 3 myself - so I fully understand how important it is for you to take a little time to honour and look after your postnatal body and mind each week for your full and thriving recovery from birth. It’s so important to be able to connect with other new Mums to share your experiences and support each other too.

Classes run on Friday mornings from 10-11.15am in the Grazeley Green Village Hall (RG7 1LD). Due to number restrictions booking is essential, and the cost is £10 per class - for block bookings of 4 the cost is £35 (£8.75 per class).

To book your slot or for more information please simply click below or get in touch by email: hannah@calmbirths.uk / call: 07852 954122

I look forward to meeting you and your baby! Hannah x

Can I do hypnobirthing on my own?

This is a really commonly asked question - it may be that you have a serving partner in the military who will be away for the birth; you are going it alone and don’t plan to have a birth partner with you, or that you don’t feel that your birth partner is on board with hypnobirthing.

If you know that your birth partner is going to be away, or if you are planning to solo parent, it is still so valuable to have a birth partner with you on the day - this could be a friend, a sister, a Mum - just a friendly face to hold your hand.

I have taught lots of people over the years who, for varying reasons, have chosen to have such a birth partner and have brought them along to the classes with them so that they can understand the hypnobirthing techniques to support the birthing person.

However, if this is not an option for you, or your birth partner is not on board with learning the techniques then please don’t despair! Yes it is beneficial to have someone present who can support you in the techniques, but it is also possible to do it alone.

The idea behind hypnobirthing is that you train your mind to reach that deep state of relaxation (more about that here) in order that you can float through labour and whatever is happening on the day without feeling frightened, anxious or out of control. Yes having a birth partner helps this, as they will learn how to help you reach that state easily and quickly, but it is also possible, with lots of practice and guidance from your teacher, to learn how to get there yourself during labour.

Our teachers all develop beautifully supportive relationships with their clients, and are there for them all the way through until they can meet your baby afterwards! To find yours just click here.

Why pregnant people should NOT eat pineapple.

Ok, so that’s a bit of a sensationalist headline isn’t it?! But when you’re pregnant you are constantly bombarded with these messages of ‘you MUST do this’ or ‘whatever you do, DON’T do that!’ which can feel somewhat overwhelming and scary - who do you listen to?

This is why our course is carefully created from accurate, evidence based information, accredited by the Royal College of Midwives. But enough of that - what about the pineapple?

So there are many old wives tales about what you should and shouldn’t eat in pregnancy, and pineapple is often one that comes up.

It’s usually cited as something you should eat to help you go into labour, when I ask my clients which methods they have heard of for naturally inducing labour, pineapple, curry and sex are always top of the list.

Pineapple is thought to contain an enzyme called bromelain, which is known to stimulate the prostaglandins in the body which in turn soften the cervix. It is difficult to find any hard evidence on this, but it is widely believed that the bromelain is contained in the core of the pineapple, which needs to be fresh as the bromelain is lost in the canning process.

It is also widely believed that the levels of bromelain are low, meaning that you would need to eat approximately 7 fresh pineapple cores in order for it to work its magic!

So, it’s not looking great for pineapple to be a natural induction tool. However, what we ALSO know, is that in the last trimester of pregnancy, the bowel slows down a lot due to those pesky hormones - this can often lead to constipation and the awful haemorrhoids (piles) and so in fact eating lots of fresh fruit is really helpful for that.

In conclusion, if you really feel like eating 7 fresh pineapple cores there may just be a chance that it might soften your cervix a little, but it’s not going to do enough to warrant the awful indigestion and diarrhoea that will be involved in the process!

There are lots of other natural methods that we can use to safely help bring on labour, they are discussed in the Calm Births book here, or discussed on a course with any of our teachers.

Can you use hypnobirthing with induction of labour?

So a question I’m often asked is if hypnobirthing can still be used if you need to be induced. In a word? YES!!

In actual fact, in my humble opinion (formed after 10 years service as a Midwife, 6 as a Hypnobirthing teacher and being a Mum of three) hypnobirthing techniques are actually even more valuable in a birth where there is an induction, or indeed any other clinical intervention.

The reason I know this to be true is that the whole purpose of the Calm Births course is to provide birthing person and partner with the full set of knowledge and skills needed to know how to override feelings of fear, overwhelm or stress and replace them with calm, positive ones. Once we are able to do this, our body responds accordingly, making the process happen so much more easily.

In a birth where we might need intervention such as induction, it can feel like our birth is being taken out of our control, and that we are helpless in this situation. This is not how we envisage giving birth, or indeed how we want to feel during it. And so with our help, you will fully understand the process, and will hone your skills to flick that override switch at any time you need to, allowing you to sail through the process smoothly and positively.

Having written and taught this course since 2015, and now with 40+ teachers across the UK, our feedback in this scenario is consistent - you can read about two of our clients journeys here and here.

So in conclusion, YES! We know and can say, hand on heart, that hypnobirthing definitely does work for induction!

Hypnobirthing for elective C-Section.

We are so excited to announce the arrival of our new course - Hypnobirthing for elective C-Section.

We know that the use of hypnobirthing techniques during pregnancy has huge benefits for both the parent and the baby - there’s a really interesting TED talk about relaxation during pregnancy here which explains how if we are able to relax, it actually wires the baby’s brain to have lower stress receptors - it’s fascinating!

So we know the benefits are huge during pregnancy for both parent and baby , but what about the birth itself if you’re having surgery?

Did you know that the use of self-hypnosis during surgery is proven to:

• Reduce anxiety

• Reduce blood pressure

• Lower heart rate

• Increase haemodynamic stability (less blood loss)

• Lower perceived level of pain

• Lower the risk of complications during surgery

Anecdotally, it is also believed that recovery time after surgery is also quicker.

The techniques that we teach are to prepare you to feel calm and in control in ANY situation - yes for birth, but also for major events such as surgery, a visit to the dentist, flying, PARENTING a newborn! Entering a hospital and being in theatre can feel very anxiety inducing, and so these techniques are designed to leave you both feeling fully prepared, calm and in control for a really positive, wonderful experience.

Something else we feel is very important to be included in this course is the techniques for early labour, as although a C-section is booked we do know that some parents can go into labour ahead of this. This can be a source of anxiety if you don’t know what to expect or how to cope with those early surges. So on the course we run through exactly what is happening to the body, and what you can do to remain feeling calm and in control until you are taken to theatre.

We run through exactly what it will look like on the day you have your baby, so that you are fully prepared and know what to expect. We then teach you how to use those relaxation techniques during this time to make it go more smoothly and for you to feel more calm and positive.

Early feedback from clients has been wonderful - they have been left feeling ready and excited:

I’m excited! I am nervous of corse, but I also am confident that my partner and I will be able to follow through with all the techniques we have learnt, and it is going to be a wonderful experience! I am looking forward to having a happy positive birth!

So please be assured that hypnobirthing is for ANY kind of birth, including yours. So all Calm Births teachers are now able to teach this 4 session course - to find your local teacher simply click here x

Meet Clare Lowing, the Postnatal Doula.

2020 has been a ridiculous year for everyone, and for those who have had or are having lockdown babies it is particularly challenging. Gone are the support groups of new Mums that you would normally have, gone are the friends and families popping round and helping you out. I feel for you, it’s a tough time.

But there are people out there who are helping, such as the wonderful services offered by postnatal doulas. A postnatal doula is someone who will offer you personal support both practically and emotionally after the birth of your baby.

I recently had the pleasure of meeting Clare Lowing, a postnatal Doula with many years experience and this is what I learned:

1. Hi Clare, please do introduce yourself and tell us a little about you!

Hi Hannah, Thank you for inviting me to chat with you. I’m passionate about birth and parenting and work with parents to make their early experience of parenting as positive and peaceful as possible. I’m originally from this area and it’s lovely to be back; having met my future husband at Henley College, our youngest is now studying there herself. This year I’ve especially enjoyed walking and swimming in the beautiful countryside and time for myself has included sewing, baking or writing. A perfect day would include an outdoor swim, a home-cooked meal and a board game with my family.

2. How long have you worked in and around birth and parenting? What brought you to it?

When my first daughter was born I went to a Baby Massage course purely to meet other mums; I was in deepest rural Devon and felt pretty isolated. As an Aromatherapist I felt I knew about massage but I had lots to learn about babies and went on to train as an Infant Massage Instructor with the International Association of Infant Massage (IAIM). That was about 18 years ago and I still love running these courses now. The key is that the course is about more than the massage; it’s about creating a space for mums to get-together, share and support one another. (By the way, dads and partners are very welcome to the sessions). I find it genuinely rewarding and along the way I’ve taken courses in Breastfeeding support, become a Postnatal Doula and worked as an NCT Practitioner for 10 years. I also set up Exeter Homebirth Support Group, which is one of the things of which I’m most proud.

3. What is it that you aim to do for your clients?

I say that I know I’ve been successful when my clients don’t need me anymore! As a postnatal doula, I’m ‘mothering the mother’ and what that looks like depends on what each family is looking for. I’m often providing nurturing home-cooked meals, helping with feeding issues like positioning and attachment and demonstrating, either ways to wear a baby carrier or massage for colic relief. At other times, I am taking an older child for a walk with the dog so mum can have some alone time with the baby or I’m giving dad a shoulder massage. At the end of my time with a family they should feel connected to other new families and sources of support in their area, including my Mums Group or Walk and Talk.
I started running Walk and Talk groups with the aim of providing an environment where parents and parents-to-be would find it easier to make conversations and boost their mental health. I love nothing more than listening to parents give suggestions to other parents, I’ve learnt that each mum or dad is the expert on their baby. My role is often just about helping them realise that, rather than giving them lots of advice, although there is some of that too!

4. Who are your clients and at what point is it best for them to get in touch with you?

It’s great when pregnant women and their families get in touch whether it’s for antenatal information or because they are planning their ‘peaceful postpartum’. Today we often plan carefully for birth and neglect those important early days but by planning before the birth we can make the whole new parenting experience positive and relaxed. I’m also often contacted by new parents interested in Baby Massage and Walk and Talk and they could get in touch anytime. The ideal time to start offering massage is about six weeks and my courses welcome pre-crawling babies.

5. How do you feel that COVID has affected what you do and how you offer it? Is there more need for your services in this time?

I was blown away by the response when I created a closed community Facebook group for new and expectant parents back in March. Connecting with other parents was and is more important now than ever. I moved my services straight on to Zoom and haven’t looked back. It’s not the same as face to face but in Mums Group we learnt to use breakout rooms as the group grew and we started sharing songs and games for babies. I’ve found that there are even advantages to running Baby Massage courses on Zoom - if you don’t like singing or feel your baby is too noisy, just mute! Discreet feeding and nappy changing is easy. Plus there’s none of the stress involved in getting out of the house on time. So that the mums can meet face to face, we’re meeting for socially distanced walks, which works as there is a maximum of five families in the group. I do miss baking for new mums though and look forward to re-starting face to face groups in 2021.

6. What piece of advice would you like to give to pregnant Mums right now?

Trust your instincts, know your rights, gather your support group. Plan for the early days as much as for the birth; download my free Peaceful Postpartum Planner here!

7. And finally, how can people get in touch with you to find out more?T

hank you Hannah. People can have a look at my website: www.birthbabyparent.com or find me on Facebook www.facebook.com/birthbabyparent. I’m more than happy to chat through what support or course might work best.

How do I choose a hypnobirthing teacher?

So you’re pregnant and have done your research, you’ve discovered that hypnobirthing is definitely something you’d like to explore. You probably have a little Google search for ‘hypnobirthing near me’, you have a little look on Facebook or your friend tells you about her amazing local hypnobirthing teacher. Great. But then you see that there are four different teachers in your town - how do you choose?!

It can be really difficult so we thought we’d give you a few pointers to look out for in trying to make that choice.

Midwife led Hypnobirthing Classes

One of the most important things in our mind is this - are the hypnobirthing classes run by a Midwife? No? That’s fine - they don’t have to be, but is the course they are teaching written by a Midwife and/or approved by the Royal College of Midwives?

See the thing is this - around 50% of the Calm Births teachers are not Midwives, but they are amazing and excellent teachers (who are usually Mums who have hypnobirthed themselves) and they teach our course which is not only written by a Midwife, but also fully accredited by the Royal College of Midwives. So we know that we are giving all our expectant parents around the UK good, sound, clinically correct information. You are safe in their hands.

Is the teacher actually teaching?

Something I’ve noticed recently is that although there are several listings on Google for hypnobirthing teachers in different towns, once you investigate, those teachers are no longer practising. I’ve had clients make a few different phone calls before they’ve come to me and not had any response from those others (and when I’ve investigated, it’s been because they’re now closed down). So check carefully!

What is she saying on social media?

So great, I’ve found a few hypnobirthing teachers near me, they’re all in business and they’re all Midwives. NOW how do I choose? We suggest taking a little snoop at their social media pages, are they on Facebook? Instagram? Are there any videos of them talking? Do you feel aligned to their message? Which leads us to:

Do you feel aligned to her?

Although all Calm Births teachers are teaching the same content, we are all very different people from very different backgrounds, and so therefore you will be more drawn to some than others. And that’s great - sometimes it’s as simple as that! Do you like what she’s saying and how she’s saying it? Can you trust your birth preparation journey in her hands?

When are her classes?

And finally, down to simple logistics - when are their classes, do the dates fall in with your weeks of pregnancy? (Ideally somewhere between 20 & 34 weeks) And does the day / time of the week work for you? Or does she offer private classes that you can make the days work?

So I really hope that helps a little - ultimately any hypnobirth preparation classes are going to be helpful, but even better if you get the right teacher for you!

To check out where your local Calm Births teacher is have a look here.

Become a Hypnobirthing Teacher!

Are you a Midwife, former Midwife or experienced Doula? Or perhaps you are simply passionate about normal birth and empowering women? Are you looking for a way to make a living from teaching families how to achieve positive, calm births and see them get amazing results? 

Then join our team!!! 

I am so excited to share my Calm Births Course with new instructors, I have been teaching Hypnobirthing full time since leaving my role as a Midwife in the NHS in 2014. I have taught hundreds of families and have been utterly overwhelmed by the consistent positive births that are being achieved by them.  The Calm Births Course is a combination of essential practical tips and techniques for positive birth and Hypnotherapy techniques - think NCT meets Hypnobirthing and you'll have an idea.

If you would like to share this message and teach this practical, no nonsense course to families in your area and make a GOOD living from doing so then I will provide you with:

*Face to face training*

*Course Materials*

*Help & guidance in setting up and running your own business*

*Support designing & setting up your own website*

*A family of like-minded teachers like you*

*Regular meet-ups to help & support each other *

The great news is that you can earn £3k + per month teaching something that you love. YOU decide when you teach. YOU decide where you teach. YOU decide how you teach. YOU are your own boss, with the Calm Births family here to support you. 

Your course will include: 

An introduction to Hypnotherapy

Hypnobirthing origins and how it works

The Calm Births Course content

How to teach Hypnobirthing

An introduction on how to set up and market your business

You will leave your course with everything you need to feel like a Mum boss who can run her own Hypnobirthing business and be part of something amazing, changing the lives of families all around you. 

The investment for your training course is:

Midwives / Doulas / NCT Teachers : 3 day course from 9.30am to 1.30pm, £899

Existing Hypnobirthing Teachers: 1 day course from 9.30am to 1.30pm, £499

If you are new to birth education, an extra online course will be required before the full 3 day training - the cost in total will be £1350.

If you would like to find out more or bagsy yourself a place on a teacher training course have a look here for more info, or please email: hannah@calmbirths.uk.

I can't WAIT to work with you! 

xx

What do I need to have ready for baby?

Much like the Hospital Bag scenario, it's really difficult to know exactly what you really need to have ready for baby's arrival, and what's surplus to requirements! There are so many things that you will be told that you absolutely MUST have for baby, the latest gadgets and gismos to make life easier. 

Everyone is different and chooses to live their lives differently, and that's what makes life interesting, but I personally believe that the majority of those gadgets and gismos for baby actually just make life more complicated and cluttered. 

So what do you actually need? Well a baby needs to be warm, fed, changed, loved and to sleep. Those are the things it actually needs. So with that in mind:

Clothes - well, yes. You'll need lots of vests, babygrows and hats. Depending on the time of year, they might also need a snowsuit to snuggle in for being outside (but this should be removed when they're in their car seat - see some guidelines on that here). It's always difficult to know if baby is warm enough, the best way to tell is to feel their chest or their back, it should just feel the same warmth as you. 

Food - if you're planning to breastfeed you've already got everything you need. If you're going to formula feed then you'll need formula, bottles, teats and a way to sterilise. You can get sucked into gadgetry here but you really don't need to. The easiest way to keep bottles sterile is to buy the traditional sterilising tablets and have a bowl in the kitchen with it in (replaced every 24 hours), and put bottles into it after you've washed them after each use. Then you've always got a sterile bottle ready to go, at the right temperature. If you buy a microwave steriliser, they are great but if you need a bottle NOW (which can happen!!) then it will be too hot straight after use and you'll have to wait for it to cool down. Ever tried explaining to a hungry baby that it needs to wait patiently???!!!!  And I will sound like my Mother now, but room temperature is right for baby as that is how your milk comes if you were breastfeeding. If you ever offer baby warmed milk you're really setting yourself up for trouble - be warned!!!! 

Also in the food category I would say Muslins - you cannot have enough muslins, you'll need one in every room and one in your changing bag. Baby's throw up, often on you when you're out! They also dribble whilst feeding or just after, having a mussy tucked under their chin or to hand to mop up is great. Buy lots of these!!!

Changing - The bag. God people spend £££££'s on changing bags! I've always found that a nice big handbag with lots of pockets is fine, it doesn't have to be an official 'changing bag' to serve it's purpose! 

You'll obviously need nappies (buy shares in these!), some people prefer cloth and some prefer disposable - it's your choice. Warm water and cotton wool is the gentlest way to clean baby's bottom, but this isn't practical when you're out so you will need wipes if you ever want to leave the house. I do strongly suggest buying a tub of vaseline, if you apply this generously to baby's bottom and bits after each nappy change, you will avoid nappy rash - it also means that poo doesn't stick to their skin and comes off easily. You're welcome. 

Sleeping - Again this comes down to choice, but baby is safe to co-sleep with you under usual circumstances, and you cannot spoil a newborn baby. Just because they co-sleep with you for the first couple of months of their lives (or longer), doesn't mean that they'll be 12 and sleeping in your bed. However it is important to be armed with the facts on co-sleeping, and you can find those with the Lullaby Trust. There are lots of options to have baby in your room and very close to you if you prefer not to co-sleep, such as a Moses basket next to your bed.

Baby will need other things as time goes on, but you will discover what you would like to have for him or her as you go along. You'll want a play mat or something that you can lay baby down on, but you won't need this immediately. 

The first few weeks baby will just need to be close to you - slings are amazing for this, and most (but not all) babies will be happy to just be in the sling with you whilst you are out and about. There are lots of sling libraries popping up now where you can try different types out to see how you like them before you buy one. 

When out and about you'll also want a car seat and a pram - this is pretty overwhelming for most of us, just have a play with things until you find the one that works for you. But please don't fall into the trap of carrying baby around everywhere in the car seat, it's not good for them and it's not good for your back! 

And finally: Love. And I'm pretty sure you've got that covered.

How to shorten your labour by eating dates!

So we've been talking about the importance of eating Dates in the last month of pregnancy for several months now at Calm Births. So I thought it about time to actually sit down and take a look at the evidence!

So what's all this about eating dates? You may or not have heard but eating 6 dates per day will:

Lessen your chances of needing induction and make your labour shorter.

Woah there! Stop the press! What?! This is incredible news! So there have been a few good studies on this in the last few years and they all reached the same conclusions.

It is thought by Alkoran et al (2017) that date fruit 'probably influenced oxytocin receptors, caused more effective contractions, and better prepared the cervix for delivery'. Our ability to respond to Oxytocin (or, the 'hormone of love' as it's known) increases during pregnancy, and we produce more of it. All that lovely Oxytocin then encourages our uterine muscles to surge in order to ripen and open the cervix. So if dates are enhancing that process, then happy days! 

So as well as women being statistically more likely to go into spontaneous labour, they are also, according to these studies, going to be:

More dilated when arriving at a hospital/birth centre, more likely to have a vaginal birth and less likely to have a post-partum haemorrhage. 

Khadem et al (2007) found that 'date fruit has an oxytocin-like effect, leading to the increased sensitivity of the uterus, stimulating uterine contractions and reduces mean post partum haemorrhage'. 

The evidence is there, and reassuringly all studies conclude that Dates are beneficial for women during late pregnancy, as they reduce the need for intervention and there are no adverse effects on Mother or child. 

So - 6 dates a day from 36 weeks ladies! Ok, so admittedly dates aren't the most visually appealing fruit, and I know a lot of you are thinking yes but.. euughhh!!

So here are a few ideas for you on how to jazz them up a bit to eat them!

1. You can chop them up on cereal for a quick dose in the morning

 2. Some of these smoothies sound delish

3. Sticky toffee date cake? Yes please! 

4. A date and walnut cake, yum.

5. This super healthy Mongolian Beef recipe. 

I'd love to know how you get on with the date eating, has it worked for you? Have you any great recipes for Dates? I'd love to read your comments! x 

The Hospital Bag.

"What should I pack in my hospital bag? "

This is a question that looms in the minds of many Mums to be  - there is so much information out there about what you absolutely must have in your hospital bag. There are lists on Pinterest, there are pages on websites, there are helpful friends and family telling you what you MUST have - it can all feel a little overwhelming and can become quite a thing to fixate on and worry about.

The struggle is real..

In my years as a Midwife and after three babies of my own (who were born at home, but still all had a hospital bag packed from 37 weeks just in case) I have learnt what is actually essential in your bag - it's so easy to get carried away with this, with all the various lists out there on the interweb! So thought it might be helpful to share my basic hospital bag list - this is the stuff you need, everything else is just extras. Keep it basic, you're not going to Outer Mongolia. 

For Mum:

Your handheld notes - you will definitely need these.

Maternity Pads - these are the massive surf board ones - it's very important to use these and not the regular sanitary pads as they are designed for the Midwives (and you) to be able to monitor your blood loss after birth, if it's all absorbed in a pad it's more tricky. 

Comfy PJ's / Nightie that you can snuggle into after birth, preferably ones that you can snuggle baby into the front of too for some lovely skin to skin cuddles (and to breastfeed if you are choosing to)

MASSIVE comfy pants - literally buy a size or two bigger than usual of pants like you're Granny would wear. You'll appreciate it trust me. It also helps to house those massive pads!

Normal toiletries (shower gel, deodorant, toothbrush/paste, hairbrush/band) - even if you plan to go straight home after baby has been born (you'll be recommended to wait at least 6 hours), a shower and a teeth clean will feel like heaven afterwards.

Lip balm - it's really normal for your lips and mouth to get really dry if using gas & air.

Snackage - This should be the first priority in my mind!!!! But seriously, do take little snacks that might take your fancy during labour to keep your energy up, like jelly babies or snack bars, and also juice cartons or energy drinks. Don't forget, you're not planning on going to the Moon to have your baby, so there will always be a little shop/vending machine you can use if you need to! 

Nipple cream - obvs only if you're planning to breasfeed! But buy a good one like Lansinoh because in my experience nothing else even comes close.

An open mind - this is so important. To enter into labour and birth with an open mind and a 'go with the flow' attitude will serve you so well. Trust in the process and your body, trust in nature to take it's course and be open to however it all pans out. There is no right or wrong way to give birth. There is just birth. 

For Baby:

Nappies - obvs. Put a whole pack in. Trust me on that one.

Clothes - obvs again, but don't underestimate how many clothes a small thing can get through in a short space of time! To be totally safe take 5 or 6 of: vests, babygrows and hats.

Muslins - again you will not believe how many of these you might get through, put at least 5 in.

Baby wipes/Cotton wool - it is known to be better for baby's skin to use cotton wool and warm water to wipe their bottom and the hospital will have top and tail bowls for you to use for that. However the first few meconium poos are a nightmare to wipe, and in those instances baby wipes are much easier! 

Vaseline - if you cover baby's bottom and bits with vaseline after each clean, it makes the poo not stick to the skin and therefore much easier to clean. You're welcome.

A boob / A bottle - If you're not sure how you're planning to feed, you will already have a boob with you and you can always send someone out for formula! (This is where those muslins come in handy for dribbly feeders and also modesty)

Phone charger - to keep the juice on your phone for those all important calls & social media announcements!

Love - to give in abundance.

For Birth Partner:

Change - for car parks or vending machines

Toiletries - you might be there for a while and want to freshen up yourself, so pop in a spare toothbrush, deodorant etc.

Spare t-shirt - it gets REALLY hot in hospital, and you might feel a bit gross if you're there for a while!

Snacks - hell hath no fury like a pregnant woman when you've stolen her snacks. Keep your own stash!!

Phone charger - because you'll be taking a zillion photo's of your new baby!

Encouragement - telling your partner that they are loved, safe and doing an amazing thing will really spur her on and help her. You can't say these things too much in my opinion.

Just in case the thought of getting everything together is a bit stressful, I've put all the things you'll need for labour and the immediate postnatal period together in a convenient bag for you! You can read about your pre-packed birth bags here. x 

Ask the Midwife

It is a sad but true fact, that in many NHS Trusts throughout England, maternity services are unable to offer women the continuity of care they need and deserve due to lack of staff and funding. I'm pretty sure I can speak for all Midwives when I say this hurts them as much as it hurts you, as they all know and understand the benefits of continuity of care, but for reasons beyond their control, are unable to offer it. I say this as a former Midwife, who loved nothing more than the picturesque ideal of 'Call the Midwife' where we could build a close relationship with the women in our care, and be with them at the births of their babies understanding their worries, needs and wants.  What happens now, in most areas (although there are a lucky few areas who have amazing community teams who can actually offer the ideal) is that women see a different Midwife at each antenatal appointment, and yet another one (or more) at the birth of their baby. 

This could very easily turn into an essay on how damaging that is for a Woman's experience of birth, but I am not here to slate our NHS - our Midwives, support staff and Gynae staff do amazing jobs under really shit conditions.

There is a problem for our women though, in that due to that lack of a close relationship or easy access to a Midwife, many women are sitting at home fretting about what they deem to be 'silly' questions about their pregnancies. There are dedicated phone lines in the maternity units, but women often feel daunted by calling them as the lines are busy, or they feel that their question is too small. This can really ruin a woman's experience of pregnancy, particularly for those who are anxious. 

Something I have discovered recently though is the most amazing tool for women designed by Midwife Hannah Harvey. Her very clever app: 'Ask the Midwife' is designed to combat this - it is a tool for women to ask any question they need to about pregnancy to an actual Midwife and get a very quick and evidence based response. I had a chat with Hannah recently and this is what she said:

Can you describe the Ask the Midwife App to me Hannah?

"Ask The Midwife is the UK’s first health advice app designed and run be registered midwives for women and their families. You can download the app, ask any questions you have about pregnancy, birth and beyond and get a fast, professional and friendly response from a registered midwife."

Can you tell us a bit about you and how you came to do this?

"I have been a Midwife for 5 years, and have always had an interest in digital health and how it can benefit women and families. A study showed that 84% of women use the internet for health advice in pregnancy, and most of the time this isn’t from credible sources. I wanted to create a solution that would mean everyone had access to professional advice online, to dissuade people from using Google and parenting forums as a source of information. In my local trust I developed Facebook groups and a Twitter page to improve maternity user experience in our NHS Trust, and won an innovation award for it in 2014. Following on from that, I wanted to be able to offer digital health services to users across the whole of the UK, and hopefully internationally at some point as well. This is how Ask The Midwife was born!"

Why do you think this App is needed right now?

"We live in a time now where everyone has smart phones, and people use social media and digital services like apps and web sites all the time. Digital Health is a brand new phenomenon, but one that is taking off at a drastic rate, because it is fast, easily accessible and credible. We have already been able to offer reassurance and guidance to so many expectant parents, and it is becoming evident how much a service like this is needed, by how quickly the app has taken off and how many people are using it."

Is any question too small or silly?

"No question is too small or silly for us. We actually get lots of questions that I have never been asked as a Midwife in clinical practice, which suggests to me that there are questions that women feel are too silly/small to ask face to face, so it is really great to see them being asked via the app. It means we are providing a service that is really needed, and people are able to get their anxieties and worries out to a professional and have the reassurance they need. If you think your question is silly, it isn’t. We will always be at the other end of the app waiting to answer any questions you have, bog or small."

 

How can people get the App, and what will they pay for it?

"The app is free to download on iOS. We are planning to launch Ask The Midwife on Android and on our website in 2017. Once you have downloaded, you get one free question and then after that you can pay anything from £1.99 for an Ask - up to £24.99 for one months unlimited use."

 

You can find out more at the Ask The Midwife website - and take advantage of the January sale, with unlimited access for £17! 

 

Midwifery vs HypnoBirthing.....

I was asked recently why I left Midwifery to take up HypnoBirthing teaching. It took me a while to formulate an answer if I'm honest.  And then Facebook reminded me this week that it's been two years since I left my job as a Midwife. This brought up very mixed emotions for me, as I looked at the image of my little send off with my amazing colleagues at the maternity unit.

I love, love LOVED being a Midwife and still believe that it is one of the most challenging, rewarding, amazing jobs in the world. I loved being a part of peoples journey's into becoming a family, or extending their family. To share in one of the biggest experiences in someones life, and hopefully help to make it the best possible experience in their given situation, is an honour and a privilege.

However, sometimes it's just not enough.

Often as a Midwife the first time you meet a couple is when they are coming in to hospital in labour, or when you are called to their home when in labour. By this time the destiny of that birth is almost already written, the mother is already pre-programmed with how she is going to birth. And all you can do as a Midwife is make that journey the safest, calmest, best experience possible in that moment. And a lot of the time that is enough, the woman is able to trust you, trust her body and trust her baby, and she achieves a beautiful, calm birth.

But sometimes, a woman is entering into birth feeling anxious, frightened, and sure that this is going to be the most painful, horrific experience of her life and it's just something she's got to get through. 

And this is why Calm Births is so important to me, I can get in there from the start, before the birth process is even close usually. I can meet families and re-write the destiny of their birth story, I can re-programme the beliefs and dismiss the anxieties around labour and birth. I can do my utmost to ensure that women and their birth partners are entering into labour and birth with a skill set to help them relax, trust in the process and even enjoy the process. 

And yes, I miss out on the birth itself, but I can leave that to my wonderful beautiful Midwife friends who do such an amazing job, and trust that with a combination of awesome antenatal education and lovely Midwives, we can make a difference to women's birth stories.

And that, is why I do what I do.  

5 tips for dealing with a heat wave when you're pregnant.

So, summer is well and truly here and It. Is. HOT. Fantastic! Or not.. if you are heavily pregnant, this heat is no joke at all and can be really really awful. Unless of course you are able to spend all of your time in an air conditioned room, with a lovely big pool and cold drinks on demand. No? In that case,  I have put together some (hopefully) helpful tips to keep you cool this summer:

1) Sleeping. Or lack thereof. This is a big problem when it's hot and can leave you feeling exhausted. Try having a cold shower (as cold as you can stand it) as the last thing you do before going to bed, just lightly dry your body leaving it slightly damp and get yourself in front of a fan/ air-con unit/ window to dry off. It will drop your body temperature down nicely before getting in to bed.

Sleep with a cool flannel on your forehead, and just under a single sheet. Another trick whilst lying in bed is to visualise being somewhere reaaaaallly cold, and fool your body into thinking it's not hot - you have to really use your imagination but it can work! (Those of you who are HypnoBirthers will appreciate the strength of mind over matter)

2) Water spray - these are amazing, just a small bottle like this one from Boots for only £1.55 kept in your handbag during the day and by your bedside at night can offer wonderful instant relief.

3) Peppermint foot cooling gel - I found this one from Body Shop but they are sold in lots of places. I was gifted some by a friend when pregnant with my first, and it was hands down the best thing I was bought! Getting to sleep when pregnant can be tricky even when it's not hot, and lots of people suffer with restless leg syndrome - I found this stuff worked wonders.

4) Water, water and more water. Sorry, I know it's a boring one but the importance can't really be stressed enough. You need to have a good water intake when pregnant normally, and if you're losing moisture through perspiration in the sun then you and baby need even more. The trick to know whether you're getting enough is your pee - if it is clear and odourless then that's perfect, keep up the good work. If your pee is a bit on the yellow side and has an odour, then try drinking a bit more (spread the increase throughout the day, don't go and down a litre of water). 

5) Cankles anyone? Have your feet / ankles / calves all merged into one attractive lump in the heat? Upping your fluid intake actually helps with this too, as it works through your lymphatic system and helps to flush it all out. Keep your feet elevated whenever you can too, whilst watching TV or even at your desk, have your feet as raised as you can. 

Failing all that, fill a bath with iced water and settle in for the day! 

Six things to know when considering a home birth.

Picture courtesy of homebirthaustralia.org

In my years as a Midwife, I was very privileged to attend births in the homes of families, and to learn about exactly what happens, how it goes, and what happens in the (rare) event of an emergency. So when it came to be my turn to become a Mumma myself, I was 100% confident in my choice to birth my babies at home, and so I did. Three times. And I have to say that they were the three most wonderful, life altering, amazing experiences of my life. And if I had the choice (and the finances) then I would do it over and over again. THAT is how passionate I am about home birth. Don't get me wrong, I DO wax lyrical about it, but only when asked about it. I would never dare to presume anything about anyone's individual circumstances or situations, and push my ideals on them. That's just not cool, and I do also strongly believe that a woman will birth calmly and gently if she feels safe in her environment. To some that will mean hospital, others a birth centre, and others at home. To each their own.

However, if home birth is something that you have on your radar and are wondering about, then I have collated a list of six things you need to know in order to feel informed in making a decision:

1) HypnoBirths do not have to be at home. I feel that that is an important point to make, as it is a common misconception. A woman can use her HypnoBirthing skill set no matter what the scenario or environment - that's kind of the point of HypnoBirthing really, that you are given the skills to be able to relax and calmly birth no matter where you are or what's going on around you. 

2) The stats! The idea of home birth without knowing much about it is quite scary. I get it. So let's look at the statistics, which speak for themselves. Statistics from NICE (the guidance of whom Midwives must legally follow) and the 2011 Birthplace study show:

•  A woman is MORE likely to achieve a normal vaginal delivery at home than in an obstetric unit or birth centre (984 at home vs 927 in an obstetric unit)

• A woman is a lot LESS likely to have an episiotomy at home than in a birth centre or obstetric led unit (15 at home vs 35 in a birth centre and 56 in an obstetric unit)

• The incidence of instrumental delivery (forceps or ventouse) is MUCH lower at home too - this is just 9 at home vs 23 at a birth centre and 38 in an obstetric led unit.

• The incidences of babies born without serious medical problems is exactly the same at home or at hospital (997) - and so, therefore, is the incidence of babies born with problems (3) - which leads me nicely to my next point.. 

3) A Midwife attending a home birth is equally able to deal with an emergency as a midwife in a hospital. Now, as you can see from the stats, an emergency scenario is very rare in a home birth. However, community midwives are trained up like ninja warriors. The merest whiff, suggestion or feeling that something is amiss and those ninja midwives will be stepping up and shipping you out. If something happens quickly and unexpectedly, those ninja community midwives have all the life saving equipment and skills that a midwife in hospital has. Trust me, they KNOW what they're doing - the same thing could happen up a mountain, in a hospital or at your house, they would deal with it in exactly the same professional, safe way. 

4) The house is not left in a mess. This is another understandable worry, but again, those ninja community midwives will clean up everything before they leave. You won't even notice they're doing it, as you will all be snuggled up safely in your own bed basking in the glory of cuddling your newborn baby. The midwives will quietly just clean up and take any rubbish away with them, and birth really isn't that messy - certainly not as it is so often portrayed in rubbish tv dramas. Having said that, it's easy to prepare, you can just buy a cheap 'value' shower curtain to lay on the floor if you have lovely cream carpets, and get out some old towels that you don't mind throwing away afterwards. 

5) Home births are ideal if you have a 'low risk' pregnancy. Now this is true, but if you are not sure if you are low risk, then a quick chat with your community midwife or the lovely people at AIMS will give you more of an idea. There is an increasing trend for women who have had a previous cesarean section to go on to have a vaginal birth (VBAC) at home. This is definitely worth investigating if this is you. It must always also be remembered that it is your birth, and your choice. 

5) You can still birth or just labour in water if you choose to. There are many wonderful local homebirth support groups who lend out birth pools for free, you just have to buy the disposable liner that goes inside it for approximately £15. These pools are like the most luxurious paddling pools in the world, with inflatable bases that make you feel as though you are floating in a cloud. They are just filled with a connection to your taps, easy. 

6) Once you make the decision you can change your mind. This is really important - a good mindset to have for labour and birth is to just go with the flow and see what happens. This includes your choice of place of birth - a good idea is to consider that you will start your labour at home and see how you go, with everything in place to have a home birth should you choose to. Have a hospital bag packed too, and if you decide along the way that you would prefer to be in a birth centre or hospital, then you can do that too, no problem.

So there we have it. It is a big decision, and it is YOUR decision. But there is loads of advice and support out there for women who choose to birth at home, and I defy you to find a woman who has done so who won't wax lyrical about it, just like I do. 

If you are considering home birth and would like to chat about HypnoBirthing in Berkshire then please don't hesitate to contact me. x

When a calm birth hits the headlines

I have been really saddened today to see an article in the paper (not one that I am a fan of, admittedly) - with the headline:

'London woman claims her 5 hour labour was PLEASURABLE'

Now, I have several issues with this. Firstly, the use of the word 'claims' - the author is clearly implying that the mere suggestion that a labour can be pleasurable is absolutely preposterous, and is mocking the Mother. This author also emphasizes the point that the Mother didn't use drugs - as if this is something unheard of and ridiculous.

Whilst I'm happy that HypnoBirthing is in the news, and this Mum clearly had a wonderful birth, why one woman's beautiful, enjoyable, calm HypnoBirth should be headline news bewilders and saddens me. This is how birth can and should be for every woman, and a natural, 'normal' birth should exactly that, the norm, not a freak occurrence to be scorned.  I am also saddened that the author of this article is a woman, and although she hasn't written anything outwardly negative, she very clearly has an issue with the fact that a woman has enjoyed and is celebrating her baby's birth. Women should be supporting each other, and celebrating together when a baby is born. Whatever happened to the sisterhood?!

I would be really interested to hear your comments on this, the link to the article is here

 

Why can't I just teach myself HypnoBirthing at home?

This seems to be a question I am hearing or reading more and more. And it's a fair question, and I respect that it's always good to challenge things - so I thought I would try to answer it as well as I can from my perspective as a HypnoBirthing Practitioner and experienced Midwife.

It is possible in this wonderful age of technology now to buy and listen to the course CD, download lots of birthing affirmations and watch lots of positive HypnoBirths on YouTube. So what else do you need right? Surely if you're doing all of these things then you've got it covered?

Well, yes - there will be some women for whom this is enough. But in all honesty, these women are pretty few and far between (and please comment if you are one such lucky lady!)

So what else are you getting from a course that you can't teach yourself? And why should you shell out all that money?

Well, the first, and to my mind the most important, thing is the support. Firstly the support for you as the woman who will be birthing the baby; it is so important to have the positive reinforcement of why HypnoBirthing works and how. The course practitioners are of varying backgrounds, but most (if not all) have birthed their own babies and many are Midwives or Doulas who have been with many women at the births of their babies. These practitioners are all passionate about one thing: HypnoBirthing. They all exude such confidence and passion on the subject that it is contagious. It is quite frankly impossible to attend the sessions and not to feel empowered, informed and supported in your personal journey. They won't just meet you in class and that be it, most will be available to you by phone or email before, during and after the birth of your baby to offer support and advice. That is something that you just can't get that from a CD or a book!! 

That support is equally important for your birth partner. The course is designed to teach the birth partner to understand exactly how important their role is (and man, is it important!) - and exactly what it is they can do for you during your pregnancy and birth to really help and support you. This cannot be overemphasised - you and your birth partner are a team, and you need to learn and be treated as such.

The practical elements of the course are very difficult to learn by reading or watching clips. I see many questions from women who are self-teaching asking forums if they are doing the breathing correctly, how perineal massage works and so on. In the classes we lead you into many wonderful relaxations to guide you in how it should be, including the fantastic Fear Release script which is very powerful and cannot be self taught. The light touch massage is another very powerful tool for the birth partner to use, we demonstrate this in class so that they really get it (and Mum gets a lovely treat as we practice on her!)

The cost is a common question - and again a fair one. However these classes are not just a few hours in a classroom with some lady talking about breathing. Your teacher will invest in you and your story, in your pregnancy and your birth. She will be there for you, tailor her care to you and become a part of your journey. It isn't really the 'cost' of the course, it's an investment in your life.

So, I hope that I've summed it up ok. I genuinely feel that my couples leave my classes floating on a cloud of relaxation and empowerment, and this gives them the tools to go ahead and have the wonderful HypnoBirth that they are capable of. And I just don't think you can read that in a book..